Monkeys

I couldn't even make this up. One of the kids in my 9th grade English class had a couple small fuzzy looking toy things on his desk. We were doing a writing assignment when he put up his hand to call me over. I should have known better, this kid is not known for his work ethic. Even so it was still a surprise when I got to his desk and the following happened:

Student- Oh Teacher, I'm glad you came over- I wanted to show you my monkey.
Me- Excuse me? what Monkey?
Student- my little Monkey- I like to play with my monkey, see- I am kissing the monkey. (picks up fuzzy monkey toy thing and kisses it)
Me- You do know that monkey is also English slang for man parts?
Student-Monkey? Really? Oh crap- I feel like an idiot.

I was laughing so hard I almost had to leave the room.

(Repeating this conversation in the staff room led to me learning at least 5 new German slang words for man parts- It was almost as awkward as the original conversation about the monkey)